I confess. I did my application last minute. I was up for three days writing my essay and getting together all the shit I needed. Granted, I was applying for another school and producing a play at the same time. I’m not sure if that is the greatest excuse.
My mindset at the time was one of desperation. I had just finished a screenplay that did extremely well in competition. I had quit my job about the same time the recession started and was completely and whole-heartedly depressed. My career was a loose affiliation of somewhat connected media jobs that to this day are not very impressive in resume format.
During this time I was unemployed and going through what I can best describe as a crisis of self worth. I was at my most pathetic point typing away my first full-length screenplay. I can’t tell you how many short films, training films, corporate films and other bullshit films I have written in my life. Many of which I am still embarrassed of.
SIDE TANGENT – It is amazing that all of the film work that I wrote and directed in my bachelor film program never measured up to the first film I did in high school. What I mean by that is this: when I was 16 years old I finished a video approximate run time: 15 minutes. This video was a spoof on my favorite show, The X-Files and heavily influenced by favorite director at the time David Lynch, entitled “The Y-Files.” The Y-Files was more entertaining than any other film I did from 2000-2004 and to this day it seems pretty entertaining to the audiences still wanting to watch it. I personally get too embarrassed to be in the room while it is playing. To make a long story shorter, I was broke, unemployed, living with my parents in northern California and working on a screenplay. I had never written a feature length screenplay before. The time had come. I was in a crisis of worth, like I said. I was contemplating business school, but I love to tell stories. I love the adrenaline rush of production. I love the camaraderie of cast and crew. I even got a devilish enjoyment of the drama that inevitably happens. So there I was making a deal with myself. I would write a feature and see what happens. I struggled through not having any clue what I was doing, but I managed 109 pages. I sent it in to a competition just to check how good it was. If I had not received anything from the contest I probably would have given up and applied to a Business Masters Program. A few months later I found out the judges decided my first (and untrained) screenplay was better that 4000-plus other screenplays that had entered. I was beside myself. It was a reaffirmation of my love and I took it as a sign that I was supposed to be doing this.
So back to applying to AFI… I finished my application to AFI, which is relatively simple compared to other schools. (I don’t want to dignify the other school I applied to with a mention, so I won’t. I’ll just say it also was in LA and it wasn’t UCLA or USC. I was focusing on schools that used film production as an emphasis.) I wrote my essay gave the first 30 pages to the script that did well in contest, and waited to see. In the mean time I was still writing as well as producing and directing for the northern California stage. (I know how pretentious that sounds, just understand the theater was in a warehouse, which could have killed the audience. Not exactly to code.)
Months later I got a call to schedule an interview appointment. LESSON NUMBER ONE: To get an interview, your work has to show potential. There are limited spots and it is really competitive. Here is how you gauge your work: Have you tried putting your work in competition? Did it place? Have you been professionally hired by a theater or film company? If you answer no to any of these still apply but if you don’t get an interview keep trying - age is not a huge factor. Remember huge failures can be assets as long as you learn from them. It’s never a bad idea to try to FAIL HARDER.
THE INTERVIEW
I received the phone call right after a theater production meeting. A good friend and mentor saw me receive the phone call. I was so excited. I was jumping up and down. He asked me what was going on. I told him, I have an interview at AFI. I could see the depression in his face. He still told me good job and good luck. Quickly I scheduled the interview as soon as I could.
Being close enough to drive , with no money for a hotel (or anything else). I drove down the day of my interview, which I had scheduled in the afternoon. I got up early, driving down, a pit in my stomach the entire way. I parked at Griffith park for about a half an hour going over questions I thought they were going to ask.
Arriving on campus I was feeling very intimidated and yet everyone was extremely nice. In the industry, and even in film school, it seems as if everyone has an ego the size of the planet. But, in my first impression of the Warner Brothers Building, that was not the case.
I arrive at the schedule time. (Tip: I don’t care how creative you are, it is always a good idea to arrive on time for something important.) I sit in the admissions office for a little while talking with the “Angel” behind the desk. I could tell she knew I was nervous. They took my picture and sent me up to a classroom. As I was going up to the interview room, they told me who I was going interview with - I will leave them anonymous, but just know that my jaw dropped and my knees got weak after hearing a brief synopsis of their resume.
I walk in say hello and they proceed to ask me questions. And as fate loves, none of the questions were what I prepared for. The first question was: who is your favorite screenwriter? I blanked. I knew I had to say something, but I couldn’t think of anyone. Finally I blurted out the most obscure screenwriter in my entire brain. I said, ”Kogo Noda.” Who was the preferred screenwriter of Japanese director Ozu. “That is the most unique name to come up in any interview I’ve done.” I smiled and the interview continued for forty-five minutes. I could tell you my exact questions but I’m not sure how much they would help. But I will tell you this – They are looking for a talented filmmaker, who has a passion to become a better filmmaker. They are looking for someone who isn’t afraid to work well with others. Collaboration is the basis of the curriculum – theorists need not apply. You don’t necessarily need to know a lot about filmmaker or have a golden resume, but all that helps. The main point is this: they are looking for people that still believe they can transform and lead the film industry, who have lost the naivety of the avid film fan who wants to make movies. AND you can’t be afraid of work. If you just thought, “ I guess that’s not me.” Let me tell you this – The moment you convince yourself to do it anyway, is the moment you are what I described above.
If you are standing on top of a rock with a 30-foot drop into water, and it seems do-able, and you want the glory that comes with completing that jump. Take a deep breath, a running leap, and scream all the way down. The ripples and repercussions are well worth the fear.
